The Life & Times of an Auteur.

Commentary on Pop Culture, and maybe creating some of my own.

Saturday, February 18, 2012

How To Talk to a Decepticon Revisionist (If You Must)

Myth: The Decepticons are justified in attacking Earth because humans are lesser beings and the Decepticons need resources.

Fact: If this is true, then you think that white people were justified in taking their big ships over to Africa and enslaving the darker-skinned inhabitants.

Myth: The Decepticons are all loyal comrades to each other.

Fact: -Starscream tried to overthrow Megatron many times, and failed.
-Shockwave overthrew Megatron and succeeded.
-Shockwave and Scorponok fought a Decepticon civil war for leadership.
-Swindle sold off his comrades for spare parts.
-Cyclonus thought the non-Unicronian Decepticons made "excellent gun fodder."

Myth: Decepticons are oppressed by the Autobots.

Fact: When you behave like asshole imperialists with god complexes, don't be surprised when the rest of the world doesn't want you to have a military again. I'm looking at you, Germany!

Myth: G1 Megatron gave two shits about his troops.

Fact: "Warriors are expendable, the important thing is that I get what I deserve!" -Megatron,, "The Immobilizer."


"A warrior doesn't need a head, just a good, strong body." from "War Dawn."

Myth: G1 Megatron was a competant tactician!

Fact: BWAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!! Oh wait, you're serious. Permit me to laugh harder.


  1. Decepticon apologists actually exist?

  2. No! Starscream is fuckin' AWESOME! lol

  3. Beware, Greg. You may summon the most infamous Decepticon revisionist of them all, Raksha!

  4. Who is the next villain apologist spotlight?

  5. Since we're on the topic of Transformers, Greg, did you ever watch Transformers: Prime?

    1. Nope. Well, I saw the pilot and didn't care for it.

  6. Seriously? Decepticon apologists actually exist? I know a few G1 revisionists, who think the show was actually good, but not people who think G1 Decepticons were justified in their actions.

    I think the clip of them getting defeated by fire retardant foam sums up how 'great' and 'powerful' the Decepticons really were.

    1. Yeah, they do/did. Back when I was in Transformers fandom, in the late 90s/early 00s, there was a faction of the fandom that would trigger long debates in the newsgroup about which side was right, and it had been going on for some time.

      Keep in mind, that these long debates were focused almost entirely on the first two seasons of the G1 cartoon.

      Today, most of those fans have fallen out of fandom and the fire seems to have cooled, but, yeah, they actually did exist, and Greg's ideas were taken from there.

      This was the great grand-mommy of all Decepticon apologism:

  7. "BWAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!! Oh wait, you're serious. Permit me to laugh harder."

    Not laughing hard enough. :)

  8. YES!!! I loved the one you did for Demona, and you did another one! As someone who deeply misses your villain tributes, please do more of these Greg. :)

    I'm really not fond of alternate character interpretations when they're used to white-wash bad guys. Why make up like 99 excuses for them? Why not just accept that they're the villains and just revel in what they manage to accomplish in their depravity? Some people are just strange I guess...

    Anyway, I love G1 Transformers, but even I knew as a kid what a terrible excuse for a villain Megatron really was. As Cracked pointed out, the fact that he took so long to finally execute Starscream alone is why he's a joke.

    I've always loved G1 Starscream more anyway. How did he get the "coward" reputation, when Megatron ran away with his gun between his legs plenty of times as seen here? Plus there were times where Starscream wanted stay and fight! That's why when I watched I always held out a little hope that he'd usurp Megatron so we could see how he'd really handle being the leader.

    Oh well, looking forward to more.

  9. Perhaps one on Voldemort/Draco/Death Eater apologists?

  10. Myth: Decepticons are oppressed by the Autobots.

    My response: That would only apply to the IDW Transformers comics because every Prime before Optimus was corrupted with power.

    But Megatron got very pissed off when Optimus(Orion Pax) was chosen by the Matrix of Leadership.

    Hell, the video game: War for Cybertron makes note of that.

    P.S. Prime Starscream is awesome, devious and manipulative, all topped off by the voice of Steven Blum.